But I don't want the TSA to see me naked...

If I wanted TSA agents to check out my birthday suit, I'd invite 'em to the hot springs. Since I don't have the urge to do that, I question whether I want to walk through one of the backscatter Xray machines, the next of which will be installed next fall at New York's JFK and Los Angeles's LAX after being tested in Phoenix's Sky Harbor airport over the last year. Though I've known about this for over a year, I've been in denial -- it's just too much.

The backscatter (a term which applies to the radiation method used) thingymajig -- also called body imaging -- transmits photos of more than a body's outline to a TSA agent in a remote (50-100 feet away) area. One has to choose between a pat down or this walk of shame through the backscatter thingymajig if one fails whatever the security test may be -- I don't know, but I have failed it in various airports and been pulled out of the security check line for an intimate squeezing... err, pat down. Travelers at Phoenix have been choosing the whole body imaging over the pat down, and travelers at JFK will also have that choice, but LAX passengers will be chosen for the nekkid pitchers randomly.

A good reason to avoid LAX, for me. I don't plan to tape oversize tubes of shampoo to my torso, but even if I were so inclined, I would rather have them discovered through a pat down than have my abs of non-steel image sent to a TSA agent, who has complete authority to save them and print them (though the TSA promises that will only happen if I pose a threat to national security -- which I must, since I periodically get the wand and pat down).

When is it too much? Airport security is crazy, considering how much gets through it and how much gets tossed that was no real threat whatsoever (I've personally accidentally "smuggled" all kinds of forbidden stuff through, like packets of laundry soap, lighters in the days during their banning... serious testers have of TSA security have done much worse/better).

Well, I prefer trains as a mode of transport to begin with, and these body imaging machines at airports provide me with another good reason to take the train, I think... and start finding out more about freighter travel.

• Related reading:
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  • Air Travel for Beginners
  • How to Pack for Airport Security
  • TSA Blog
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